There is no Perfect Mom

Perfection is not a Thing

As a mom, it’s common to feel overwhelmed, resentful and doubt yourself at times. The pressure to be the perfect mom can make you feel like you’re not good enough, and your teens’ attitude doesn’t exactly help. In reality, no one is perfect and you’re learning along with your kids so give yourself some grace. I’ve compiled my best tips to help you overcome feelings of unworthiness and become more confident in your role as a Mom and everywhere else in your life. Because, there is no perfect mom.

Progress not Perfection

Ready to let go? I’ve implemented each of these items and can attest to the difference they make in how I show up and how my relationships, especially with my teens, have been enhanced. Don’t try to implement them all at once. When one feels fairly comfortable and consistent, then add another one.

Set realistic expectations

It’s easy to get caught up in unrealistic expectations of what a perfect mom should be like, but it’s important to remember that you can only do your best. Set realistic expectations and goals for yourself and focus on the progress you make, rather than perfection. Remember, there is no perfect mom.

Practice self-care

Taking care of yourself is essential to being able to care for others. Showing up to your relationships exhausted, frustrated or distracted can have a negative impact on your connections and how well you can care for others. Make sure to take time for yourself, whether it’s reading a book, going for a walk, or simply taking a break.

Connect with other moms

Talking to other non-perfect moms can help you feel less alone in your struggles. I completely understand that you may not feel comfortable sharing the details of your situation for fear of judgment or shaming – of you and/or your child. Be discriminating and seek out a mom’s group, attend local events, or find an online community where you can share your experiences and receive support. This is actually why I created my group for Moms!

Reframe your thinking

Instead of focusing on your shortcomings, try to focus on your strengths and accomplishments as a parent. Think about the love and care you give your children every day and how you are doing your best. Celebrate what you are doing for yourself and what you are NOT doing, that allows you to show up authentically.

Practice self-compassion

Be kind and gentle with yourself, just as you would with your kids. Instead of criticizing yourself, try to acknowledge your mistakes, learn from them, and move forward with kindness and compassion. Like I said above, you are growing along with your child so be open to the lessons.

Seek support

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, it may be helpful to talk to a professional. A coach or therapist can help you work through your feelings and develop strategies for managing stress and improving self-esteem.

Find joy in the moment

Rather than feeling overwhelmed by the never-ending to-do list or trying to solve your kids problems for them try to focus on being present in the moment. Whether it’s cheering them on in their soccer game, listening while they talk through a problem, or asking them what they need from you, find joy in the time you spend with them.

Mom is a Role

Being a mom can be challenging but also very rewarding. Remember, there is no such thing as a perfect mom. You’re doing your best and that’s what matters. Being a mom is just one role you play and when you ignore the rest, you can’t be your best for yourself or anyone else. By practicing self-care, connecting with others, reframing your thinking and seeking support, you can become more confident in your parenting abilities and in your whole self. Curious which emotion you lead with? Take my free quiz to find out.